Tuesday, 17 November 2015

Ladies, What Happens To That Certificate?

About three years ago when I was still a pre-science student, I met a girl. I wouldn't call her my friend but we had some sort of understanding. We would take turns to visit each other in our respective rooms in the hostel, and tell stories for a long time. She had this carefree attitude I liked and did not have any trouble in the whole world. But there was a problem,this girl had a very different way of thinking.
I would have thought that for someone so pretty, so free, so studious, more was to be expected, but NO.

Sometime around November that year,she got engaged. I was happy for her, her roommates were too, everyone was, and a certain level of respect was accorded to her because she somehow proved that it wasn't such a difficult task managing school and married life after all. We still continued our normal routine of washing together, and during one of those times she asked me what I would like to venture into after school. I told her since I was in the I.T field, I would really love to go into telecommunications and Network Administration, coupled with other certifications I would love to have, then I waited for her to tell me hers. She didn't , instead she asked me another question. " Who would take care of my kids when i get married"?

I did not know what she meant by the question, so I asked her. She said she hoped I wasn't one of those girls who would desert family and pursue my career, that as far as she was concerned being in the university was just a lets-do-it-let-them-not-say thing."See eeeeh" she said. "My aim is to grab this certificate, keep it locked somewhere, get a monthly pay from my husband, settle down and train my children with my husband's cash, no woman would train my kids for me ooh"."haba, do you want your husband running to another woman because you are not there when he needs you? "

Umunnem there was nothing i did not say to convince this girl otherwise. No story i did not tell. I even had to involve one of her room mates to no avail. All my efforts futile. I gave up. I did everything I did 'cos I knew this girl before she got married. She was so so enthusiastic about things that had to do with her academics. She would leave the hostel as early as 4:am in a bid to get somewhere to sit in our lecture hall. I WAS INSPIRED BY HER. What happened?

Is a relationship not supposed to bring out the best in you? I ask this because I know girls who would go extra miles to show that their relationships are not sources of distractions, and put in double efforts into what they were previously doing. Yes I know of such girls and in more ways than one, they have excelled.
Ladies pls, bikonu, be it a friend, a boyfriend, whoever. If that person is not comfortable with the heights you've achieved in your academics, your career, if he does not encourage you to be better, to show the world your strength, then I do not know what he would be comfortable with really.

Think about this. Do you not think of the satisfaction, the joy, the respect and everything more you would get from the general public when you achieve feats not known to be achievable ? Do you not think of it all?
 It is very very possible to be a homemaker and a career woman. Know your priorities. Set them straight. Make it possible, EVERYTHING IS.. trust me, there's a separate kind of joy you would derive from knowing you succeeded not only in your career, but in your ability to keep a home.


  1. Tell them Ladies oooo.....my spouse must be innovative and a career woman, not just a sit-at-home mum

    1. Every woman should soar high and have high prospects and not just wait for the monthly salary her husband provides


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