Saturday, 17 September 2016

A Dark Hole.


I do not always remember the colour of the sky. I do not even know what blue is. My only reality is the darkness around me, and the fact that it is stuck to my soul, a parasite, never to depart from me.

I still see her smiles, her cute dimple. I still watch sponge bob square pants only because she likes bob and would wrap her hands around my neck in laughter whenever he exhibits his numerous naughty characters. I miss Omalingo, I miss her. I miss the way she would wear my big T-shirt and play hide and seek with me. The game sucks now, this is my reality, there is nowhere to hide and no one to seek me.

I tried. I tried so hard to resist the temptations that bore themselves before me. They pleasured me, those temptations, they made me feel so important, wanted."Who am I, I asked myself one certain time, who am I that all these heavenly creatures would want me?".

OH! Ifeoma's preen skin I could not resist, no matter how I tried. Omalingo found out. She shed her eyeballs out and told me to come back to her. She promised to forgive me and love me harder. She begged. She prayed, but she did not understand.

She did not understand that I still loved her. I loved her like the air I breathe, but I still wanted Ifeoma's skin.

"How can you be like this to me Jideofor?" She asked me one cold evening. "How can you joke with my love this way?, I love you Jideofor, don't do this to me. What does she have that I do not have?"

I did not give her any answer. I had none to give. There was nothing anyone had more than Omalingo. Nothing. She was everything. My everything. I did not know this, until that day, when I walked into the kitchen.

The sight of her lifeless body threatened to move my eyes from its sockets. I had, in the very moment, counted the pieces of my broken heart. I knew something had replaced my existence. Something I couldn't fully fathom but was fearful of.

Something no one could fill even if they tried..

Something I knew was, A DARK HOLE.

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